A few weekends back (prior to meeting Lo (for loquacious)), I was forced to check my drivers license to make sure "Jezebel" didn't appear in front of my first name, Breanne. You remember Jezebel, right? The Biblical chick who misled and seduced the men of God to do horrible things, like have "sex." I am so not her. Partly, because my name begins with a "B" but mostly because I can't keep a straight face long enough to seduce any man, ever.
I am that girl that giggles during a slow and slightly dirty dance and kills the mood. I am the lady who walks a bit too fast in sexy stiletto heels. I am the woman who covers up my "get 'em girl dress" with a trenchcoat in 80 degree weather in the middle of July.
I am NOT a temptress, a seductress, a Marilyn Monroe, a Jessica Rabbit, and I am not a Jezebel.
So, on this night, I was wondering why my date was calling on Jesus for the fifth time even though he and I were seated on separate sides of his loveseat. My guess was that he thought my toes - which were propped up on his lap - were getting dangerously close to his....um....bellybutton.
Jesus had become the constant companion in our time together over the past five weeks of dating. If a hug got too close, homie would yell "Praise the Lord." If my bum brushed across the edge of his thigh, he would begin a rendition of Amazing Grace. And if my goodbye kiss touched the edge of his lip, he would whisper "God is good."
All.
The..
Time...
Problem was. I'm not a heathen-happy sinner! I'm a 100% certified, Grade A, good girl, that doesn't have to subtract 10 and divide by 2 whenever a guy asks: "so how many men have you been with?"
So...
I was confused when my date started treating me like I had a bad case of leprosy...and had to wonder had my good girl swagg gone stale?
A phone call at 9pm that he took in the next "room," give me some much needed info....
I didn't catch all of the conversation, but I did hear him say "baby," "sweet angel" and "nothing." Assuming I was the "nothing" he referred to in the latter part of his list, I waited until his whisper session was done and asked very loudly through the door....
"Was that Jesus on your main line?" before grabbing my Chloe bag and heading for the door.
My gut had told me that the game of church he was playing with me, coincided with the game of house he was playing with Virgin Mary': which apparently didn't include lounging on his love seat after the streetlights came on.
On the way back to my Geo, I couldn't help asking myself was it possible to still be a 100% certified, Grade A, good girl in your 20's or was it smart to just "play" one on tv (hey Beyonce!). I mean presumably, by the age of 24, a woman has swapped spit after midnight, packed an overnight bag, and gotten a few miles out of her Victoria's secret stash.
Or...maybe Virgin Mary's still existed...
and Jezebel's were so 2001....
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ReplyDeleteWhat you might not think as seducing still could be, and obviously anything you did with this guy had him calling on the Holy Ghost to prove that point. Thats not to say that you cant be a "good girl" because while you might think have a low number of partners and or less then ten boyfriends is considered "good" other might not. At the end of the day though its not about what others think about you, it's about how you carry yourself in life. While you maybe a god fearing good girl, and tell him so he just seems like the type to only want to date a female minister, and since you have yet to write a blog post from the clergy I think you may want to pass this guy by,
ReplyDeletethat's funny Neal, because he's painted (to me) as the opposite. Seems like he wants nothing to do with a lady minister. lol
ReplyDeletePeople still say 'sweet angel'?
Lol @ Anon. But he may have a point, what was the communication? You spend 6 weeks to walk out over a convo in the next room? You know yourself best.
I think I like this...
ReplyDeleteBeing a good girl is overrated. The key is to be a nice girl with a touch of class who knows how to have fun and isn’t afraid to show it.
ReplyDeleteI think it is more of the mindset of most men rather than an ideal that you can not be a good girl in your 20s. The assumption is that in our current culture a woman is not going to make it into her 20s with out some dints and dingles. Example: If a man goes to a car lot the older the car the more he knows that cars has had a chance to go through. Most women are trying to mask problems from prior drives and some women were and are essentially rental cars off the lease. I think it is more about choosing men that have standards and exampling how you might have gotten to your age without a of miles. (give a man your carfax). But even beyond that men are raised to not put women on high for having moral character but rather for her skills and early availiblity in the bedroom. I would say keep to your morals and try to not tread in the tease area and you should be goood. Men raise to occassions, so make some stand up straight if you deem yourself worth it. Good girl is not overrated if you can get bad/fun for the right guy
ReplyDelete